Because of you

Category: Steven Wright

Steven Wright | work

I used to work in a fire hydrant factory. You couldn’t park anywhere near the place.

I saw a bank that said ’24 Hour Banking,’ but I don’t have that much time.

I bought some instant water one time but I didn’t know what to add to it.

Right now I’m having amnesia and deja vu at the same time.

I put instant coffee in a microwave oven and almost went back in time.

I went to a restaurant that serves ‘breakfast at any time’. So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance.

Everywhere is within walking distance if you have the time.

When I die, I’m leaving my body to science fiction.

There was a power outage at a department store yesterday. Twenty people were trapped on the escalators.

I was reading the dictionary. I thought it was a poem about everything.

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