H.L. Mencken

For it is mutual trust, even more than mutual interest that holds human associations together. Our friends seldom profit us but they make us feel safe. Marriage is a scheme to accomplish exactly that same end.

Whenever a husband and wife begin to discuss their marriage they are giving evidence at a coroner’s inquest.

Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who would want to live in an institution?

Strike an average between what a woman thinks of her husband a month before she marries him and what she thinks of him a year afterward, and you will have the truth about him.

Men have a much better time of it than women. For one thing, they marry later for another thing, they die earlier.

Bachelors know more about women than married men if they didn’t they’d be married too.