Dave Barry - 🦋 Beautiful Quotes

Dave Barry | funny

It is a scientific fact that your body will not absorb cholesterol if you take it from another person’s plate.

Eating rice cakes is like chewing on a foam coffee cup, only less filling.

As a child, I was more afraid of tetanus shots than, for example, Dracula.

The leading cause of death among fashion models is falling through street grates.

What I look forward to is continued immaturity followed by death.

The simple truth is that balding African-American men look cool when they shave their heads, whereas balding white men look like giant thumbs.

The Internet: transforming society and shaping the future through chat.

I am not the only person who uses his computer mainly for the purpose of diddling with his computer.

The Internet is the most important single development in the history of human communication since the invention of call waiting.

I want a pit crew… I hate the procedure I currently have to go through when I have car problems.