Andy Rooney

I like ice hockey, but it’s a frustrating game to watch. It’s hard to keep your eyes on both the puck and the players and too much time passes between scoring in hockey. There are usually more fights than there are points.

The Super Bowl isn’t for kids, I had a great time though and it was worth every nickel of it because by doing this lame piece about the game I can put it on my expense account.

My own time is passing fast enough without some national game to help it along.

Computers may save time but they sure waste a lot of paper. About 98 percent of everything printed out by a computer is garbage that no one ever reads.

I don’t like food that’s too carefully arranged it makes me think that the chef is spending too much time arranging and not enough time cooking. If I wanted a picture I’d buy a painting.